第111章

I writ him not to mention it.The Col.says it is fortnit we live in a intellectooal age which wouldn't countenance such infamus things as occurd in this Tower.I'm aware that it is fashin'ble to compliment this age, but I ain't so clear that the Col.is altogether right.This is a very respectable age, but it's pretty easily riled; and considerin upon how slight a provycation we who live in it go to cuttin each other's throats, it may perhaps be doubted whether our intellecks is so much massiver than our ancestors' intellecks was, after all.

I allus ride outside with the cabman.I am of humble parentage, but I have (if you will permit me to say so) the spirit of the eagle, which chafes when shut up in a four-wheeler, and I feel much eagler when I'm in the open air.So on the mornin on which I went to the Mooseum I lit a pipe, and callin a cab, I told the driver to take me there as quick as his Arabian charger could go.

The driver was under the inflooence of beer and narrerly escaped runnin over a aged female in the match trade, whereupon Iremonstratid with him.I said, "That poor old woman may be the only mother of a young man like you." Then throwing considerable pathos into my voice, I said:

"That poor old woman may be the only mother of a young man like you.Then throwing considerable pathos into my voice I said, "You have a mother?"He said, "You lie!" I got down and called another cab, but said nothin to this driver about his parents.

The British Mooseum is a magnificent free show for the people.

It is kept open for the benefit of all.

The humble costymonger, who traverses the busy streets with a cart containin all kinds of vegetables, such as carrots, turnips, etc, and drawn by a spirited jackass--he can go to the Mooseum and reap benefits therefrom as well as the lord of high degree.

"And this," I said, "is the British Mooseum! "These noble walls," I continnerd, punching them with my umbreller to see if the masonry was all right--but I wasn't allowd to finish my enthoosiastic remarks, for a man with a gold band on his hat said, in a hash voice, that I must stop pokin the walls.I told him I would do so by all means."You see," I said, taking hold of the tassel which waved from the man's belt, and drawin him close to me in a confidential way, "You see, I'm lookin round this Mooseum, and if I like it I shall buy it."Instid of larfin hartily at these remarks, which was made in a goakin spirit, the man frowned darkly and walked away.

I first visited the stuffed animals, of which the gorillers interested me most.These simple-minded monsters live in Afriky, and are believed to be human beins to a slight extent, altho'