第69章 BOOK I(69)

"If you mean me, Mr. Rosedale, I am very grateful--very much flattered; but I don't know what I have ever done to make you think--""Oh, if you mean you're not dead in love with me, I've got sense enough left to see that. And I ain't talking to you as if you were--I presume I know the kind of talk that's expected under those circumstances. I'm confoundedly gone on you--that's about the size of it--and I'm just giving you a plain business statement of the consequences. You're not very fond of me--YET--but you're fond of luxury, and style, and amusement, and of not having to worry about cash. You like to have a good time, and not have to settle for it; and what I propose to do is to provide for the good time and do the settling."He paused, and she returned with a chilling smile: "You are mistaken in one point, Mr. Rosedale: whatever I enjoy I am prepared to settle for."She spoke with the intention of making him see that, if his words implied a tentative allusion to her private affairs, she was prepared to meet and repudiate it. But if he recognized her meaning it failed to abash him, and he went on in the same tone:

"I didn't mean to give offence; excuse me if I've spoken too plainly. But why ain't you straight with me--why do you put up that kind of bluff? You know there've been times when you were bothered--damned bothered--and as a girl gets older, and things keep moving along, why, before she knows it, the things she wants are liable to move past her and not come back. I don't say it's anywhere near that with you yet; but you've had a taste of bothers that a girl like yourself ought never to have known about, and what I'm offering you is the chance to turn your back on them once for all."The colour burned in Lily's face as he ended; there was no mistaking the point he meant to make, and to permit it to pass unheeded was a fatal confession of weakness, while to resent it too openly was to risk offending him at a perilous moment.

Indignation quivered on her lip; but it was quelled by the secret voice which warned her that she must not quarrel with him. He knew too much about her, and even at the moment when it was essential that he should show himself at his best, he did not scruple to let her see how much he knew. How then would he use his power when her expression of contempt had dispelled his one motive for restraint? Her whole future might hinge on her way of answering him: she had to stop and consider that, in the stress of her other anxieties, as a breathless fugitive may have to pause at the cross-roads and try to decide coolly which turn to take.